3.23.2008

lesson learned

So it seems as though I've been replaced.

I'm being replaced a lot these days. By friends, former lovers who call themselves my 'friends', family...mostly just by people who are suppose to love me unconditionally. Let me be the first to tell you, being replaced isn't fun. It's actually kind of brutal. But one thing is for sure, I seem to be taking it a lot better than I would have a year, month, or even a week ago. It's all in a days work I guess...

It's so funny the love and respect I pass out without anyone giving it back to me. I put everyone first in my life, but I don't seem to get that same treatment back. With my friends, it seems like I'm only good until...well something better comes along. This could be a new boyfriend or girlfriend...or just a new friend in general. Makes me kinda feel like milk...only good until I turn sour. And then with men, it's just that I'm only worth something until the find out they can't get it, hit it, and then quit it...or just until something better comes along...again. Stuff like this can be taxing on a girls heart, but I've grown some thick skin and big balls, and I'm determined not to let this stuff get to me.

Basically, I'd just really like it if people would place me at the top of the list instead of placing me behind other things and people. I kinda wish I got the same love that I give on a daily basis. I just kinda wish God would place people in my life that are going to last and not throw me for a loop every time I turn around. Because in all honesty...that shit gets really old.

Just putting it out there...
D'Onna LeSean

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