my new years resolution in a nutshell.

I thought about creating this long ass list of "things I should change/do in the new year".

But then I read this, and it summed up everything I wanted to say/do in 2011.

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple

With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.

And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves

And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.

I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired

And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells

And run my stick along the public railings

And make up for the sobriety of my youth.

I shall go out in slippers in the rain

And pick flowers in other people's gardens

And learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat

And eat three pounds of sausages at a go

Or only bread and pickle for a week

And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry

And pay our rent and not swear in the street

And set a good example for the children.

We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?

So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised

When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

Jenny Joseph [via]

recovering lazyoholic.

This may be a bit unremarkable to the naked eye, but seriously, how many times have you forgotten to do simple things like check the expiration date on that bottle of ketchup in your fridge, take your vitamins, or just to simply say F#@k it. I use to write reminders to myself on little post-it's, but this looks way cooler. Thanks Erin Hanson!

the 50 best protest signs of 2009.

Buzzfeed gathered the best protest signs of 2009, and they're pretty awesome. I can't believe you actually see some of these at gatherings that are meant to be somewhat serious. My mind is too busy laughing to formulate a thought for me to write, so all I have to say is: HAAAAAAAAAAAA! [thedonutproject]

do we really want fame?

I was researching the name of this art festival in Italy called FAME when I ran across the meaning of the word in Italian. I think it's a bit ironic that in the English language fame is a status that's sought after rigorously by some, while in Italian its a word to describe hunger and poverty, the exact opposite of what it means here.

things that make you go hmm.

I just want to let you all know I'm writing this post with an open mind. An open mind. OPEN MIND.

Sometimes I have to say it a couple times before it actually happens...

Now that my mind is open I can adequately analyze these photos and render my clear, concise, and nonjudgmental opinion. But let's leave the bullshit at the door and get right down to it. I think these photos are Ok. Some of the photos I like a lot, and some of them are typical. Typical is not what I was expecting to feel. They don't blow me away, but the also don't leave me wanting to slap someone. I'm sticking to my initial opinion, she still looks awkward and more Grace Jones-ish than before, only after seeing all the photos from the supplement I'm now left feeling...weird for lack of a better word. Think about it: she's pretty much the love child of women like Kelis, Grace Jones, Madonna, and Courtney Love. I'd also say Fefe Dobson for the sake of being obvious, but Rihanna has surpassed Fefe level.

Rihanna may be a culmination of all the bad ass vixen fire cracker women entertainers of the last 20 years, but she lacks one thing: IT. Grace Jones woulda tore this editorial up, down, ate it, spit it back out, and served it to us on a plate of fire. These pictures may remind me of Grace Jones, but Rihanna lacks the one thing Grace, Madge, Kelis, and Courtney have: INHIBITION. It just seems like she's putting on a show...like the tough girl who talks a good game but ain't about shit. Or maybe I'm wrong... [rihannadaily]

PS. Digging the big. That is all.

i still don't get it...

I'm not one for posting gossip, but I do post my biased opinion on just about EVERYTHING, and this is no exception. For the back story, everyone's favorite bisexual and Kanye's best piece of arm candy Amber Rose hosted the TAO beach party in Vegas this weekend. End backstory.

This weekend I had an intense conversation with my friend (who happens to be male) about Amber Rose and her prospects for being a model in the general form. He believes because she's attached to Kanye West, it's more than possible, almost a damn near guarantee she'll be successful as a runway/editorial model. And not just any type of modeling mind you...Homie believes it'll be high fashion. I'm talking the Chanel, YSL, Lanvin type of high fashion. NO MAS! My opinion was the exact opposite. Of course Amber Rose will be no where NEAR a high fashion runway, and in my mind isn't going to be anywhere near a Vogue/Harper's Baazar/Elle/Marie Claire any time soon either. Because I'm a card carrying member of the "Amber Rose is a Bad Bitch" fan club, I'm holding out for her to maybe show up in some indie-ish mags a la V, W, Flair, or Pop.

But let's be honest for one moment. When you see women like Chanel Iman and Sasha Pivovarova (who together still weigh less than the average American) in several editorials a month, and Lara Stone who is probably the largest woman on a runway reigning in at 5' 10" and a US size 6...is there seriously any room for the likes of Amber Rose. Is the fashion world willing and wanting to open their arms to her? And if by some miracle in heaven they happened to allow her on a runway, in an editorial, should we then just chalk it up to Kanye West's power? [pictures via theybf]

PS. Dear Amber, Please do not ever wear ice blue contacts. You look demonic, and possessed. Besides those obvious facts, it takes away from your beauty and makes you look like a reformed stripper...O wait...you are a reformed stripper.

PPS. And please work on your poses, I'm pretty sure we'd never see poses like that in Vogue, now would we?

neurogasm. as in orgasm?

So I was pursuing around the internet last night, and I stumbled on a review for these "Neuro" drinks, but the only one that stood out to me was the one called Neurogasm. Why you ask? Well because when was the last time you saw a beverage that had a name similar to a bodily function meant to make you...well...you know. Anyway, hopefully you can understand my confusion...as well as my interest in learning more.

After further research I found out that Neurogasm use to be meant to increase sexual performance, but because someone got their granny panties all in a bunch, the bottle now just says it's meant for 'body performance'....Oh I know what that means (wink wink).

Still it would be kinda funny to walk now the street with an orgasm in your hand. Literally, sorta, not really...

joe jackson: a case in parental fail.

I didn't put a picture of Joe Jackson on this post even though it's mainly about the guy, for the sheer fact that his face scares me. Serioulsy...scary.

Joe Jackson is the biggest case of Parental Fail for a bunch of reasons. Not only did he use his children to get out of a bad situation (thanks Beyonce for the quote), and vicariously live through them because he wasn't successful as a musician himself, he's now attempting to pimp his grandchildren.

I thought his incessant fuckery would stop now that MJ has been laid to rest, but looking back on that thought, I can see where I went wrong. Plugging his record label, and being open to vaguly speak about his son's death was just the tip of the iceberg for this guy. He's now gone on to achieve the task of closely watching which of Michael's children will follow in their fathers footsteps...with him pushing them the entire way. Who will be the cash cow this time Joe? Only time will tell, right?

"I don't know — I keep watching Paris. She … wants to do something. And as far as I can see, well, they say Blanket, he can really dance," Joe said.

Once a leech, ALWAYS a leech.

pharrell becoming a dirty old man.

I haven't been paying an attention to Pharrell recently. I think I've gotten over my intense crush over him, so I guess that's lead me to not really care anymore about his day to day activities. But today I noticed this: Pharrell is starting to look like a dirty old man. The above picture screams this fact from the rafters, no? Maybe its the Samford & Son's hat, maybe he's trying to mature himself and step away from the whole BBC Ice Cream get up he's always seen in, or maybe I'm being a hater, whatever...He still looks like a dirty old man.

Nice mustache.

whats a goon to a goblin?

Last night I saw pictures of Vibe's last issue, featuring cover girls The Dream and Christina Milian via Necole Bitchie, and tons of interesting questions began running through my mind. Like for one, I'm still not entirely sure how and why these two are together. Call me a hater, but it looks odd. She looks amazing in these photos and he looks...well, awkward. How many guys would kill to be with her?

And two, I've never really liked The Dream, not entirely sure why, I just never have gotten down with him or his music, maybe its because his clothes are so small. As far as Christina Milian, I liked her more when she wasn't with him. I don't know what it is, but these two rub me a funky kinda way. Maybe it's all that whoring for propaganda Freshalina keeps talking about...Hmmm

being a blogger sometimes pays off.

Popular retailer Urban Outfitter just announced that they will be collaborating with Jane Aldridge of Sea of Shoes who will design pairs of shoes under the label J. Aldridge for Urban Outfitters. The first three pairs will be released July 15, and the last three in December.

Jane is a seventeen year old who has already made quite an impact on the fashion blogging scene. She's been featured in Teen Vogue twice now, and along with her newest endeavor designing for UO, she also keeps up with her blog, showcasing her love for footwear, as well as her fashion inspirations and travels.

I'm officially jealous.

This information about Jane just goes to show that keeping a blog and actually working hard enough to make it successful, might actually work out one of these days.

is tim burton going to screw up 'alice in wonderland'?

Just saw the first pictures from Tim Burton's take on 'Alice in Wonderland' and all I have to say is WOW. I'm some what a Burton fan, The Nightmare Before Christmas' is one of my favorites, but I'm a little scared as to what he's planning on doing with this classic. His interpretation of 'Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory' was wack, but from the looks of these photos the director might actually have something, visually that is...

If the movie sucks there's always the Academy Award for Best Makeup right?

Movie is due out in 2010.

Lauren Conrad Looks Russian.

Now that Lauren Conrad is basically done with her popular reality show The Hills I guess she decided to reinvent herself with new hair. Dark hair. SHORT hair. I would actually like it if it was real. But alas...it is not.

The 20 something soon to be author (I know, I didn't think she could read either!), halfway designer, and all the way actress was working it out in this brown bobbed wig for a shoot with fashion magazine Harper's Baazar. In all honesty, I really like the entire look on LC. Makes her look very grown up and mature, a far cry from her always casual L.A. style. The color of the wig really makes her eyes pop. If she were to ever go dark permanently I think it would suit her, because Lord knows that flannel shirt, skinny jean, chunky heel thing she had going on during her Hills phase every single episode was killing me softly...

Do you like this new style on Lauren?

via Confessions of a Bad Boy

via Everything You Love to Hate